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Travels with Myself

Travels with Myself

Navigating life after loss. Finding inspiration on the journey.

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Category: Roots and Wings

Life’s Holding Patterns

August 3, 2012August 13, 2012 ~ storiesbykate ~ 2 Comments

A holding pattern (n) is defined by the dictionary as 1. A usually circular pattern flown by aircraft awaiting clearance to land at an airport. 2. Informal A state of waiting or delay; a static situation A couple of years ago, I wrote about some of the holding patterns that God puts us through... 1. … Continue reading Life’s Holding Patterns

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It’s good to be back home ❤️
I think of this today in the middle of all the holiday revelry. This “calendar” becomes even more prominent during the Christmas season. I look back and think of what Christmas was like as a child and teenager, before and after my father died. I think of the last 25 years in the context of this before and after. I think of everyone I know who has lost a loved one this year, or for whom this is the first Christmas without them. I want you to know that although on some days it will feel like the worst of times, you will survive this period just as so many others like you have done so in the past. Take extra time for self-care. Don’t feel the need to explain your absence at parties or family gatherings to everyone. Be true because pretending takes even more energy. Don’t isolate either. Be with a friend or a trusted family member. Plan for a different Christmas this year. Go away for a while if you can. The pain will still be there but the distance from everything and everyone familiar will help ease the pain of a first or second Christmas without your loved one.
In Cottonwood, Arizona, a few weeks ago, I found myself in the largest antique store in the US. It was almost closing time and I had less than 10 minutes to browse the store. I did a quick sweep and my eyes fell on this beautiful pair. Immediately I thought, this is perfect for my BFFs daughter! Fifteen days earlier, on the day I arrived in San Francisco, my BFF had passed away in Manila. So I picked up this mother-daughter figurine and bought it just as the cash register was about to close. Initially, I had thought the figures were that of a mama angel looking after her daughter. When I unwrapped it back home and inspected it, I was surprised to discover that it was supposed to be two angels but the smaller one did not have wings (yet), or that the wings had fallen off for some reason. I was even more convinced then, that my BFF, Boots meant for me to find this piece as a Christmas message for her daughter, ANGELA. It was as if she wanted to say, “I am with you always now, holding you close, and watching and loving you everywhere you go.” I am always grateful for these grace filled moments in life where once more we see how love reaches down from the heavens. How love will always be more powerful than death.
Grace. Kindness. Christmas.
All you really need is love, and a sunset. Thank you, California! Thank you, Jesus for a grace filled time away with family, friends, and loved ones. Thank you for your protection upon me and all my loved ones while we were apart. Thank you for the healing, the joy, and the love. Until the next time, I keep a part of my ❤️with you. #thisis55🌿
So powerful, and so true. ❤️ When we talk about things with people we trust, sometimes the truth rises in the telling, and it is what liberates us. Bearing witness to this by listening with our hearts, is also a wonderful gift we give to the other, and to ourselves. ❤️

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Between Loss and Forever

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Kate turns golden

The Big DayOctober 16th, 2014
The big day is here.
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